Gonan means Struggle

This is a video I made last fall. It reflects some of the struggles I have experienced regarding my cultural identity.(probably on-going)

One of my good teacher's advice: "We all hope to be understood", meaning no one will be understood if we don't compromise.

I am sensitive to my feelings, and I express them very frankly. I know when I get scared, fearful, or nervous. I know when I feel stuck. I cry like it's the end of the world when I feel hurt. I freak out. I can be really loud about my feelings. And I may start thinking and feeling as if I am going to pass out, just like when Goldfish jump out of the fishball and soon it passes out. However, I am like a weirdo Goldfish jumping back into the fishball. Luckily I have special power that I can get myself up after falling down. Sometimes it happens the next morning, other times, takes longer. But I know I will get going again.

by the way, I think this is genetic.